A couple of weeks ago I was reminded of a meeting I attended about a year ago. It was with the Upaya Sangha and it was their first in person meeting in two years. I was so excited as I was just in from out of town and it was a group I attended when I could. I was sure there were going to be a lot of people attending.
When I pulled up, I wondered if I got the wrong time/date. I didn't see any cars. Then I saw someone pull up. I got out and followed him. We were both wearing wide brimmed hats and lugging our lawn chairs since it was outside.
There, in the backyard of the meditation hall, sat the Sensei and his wife, in lawn chairs, under a tree. There was a small circle of partially-filled chairs surrounding them.
Eventually there would be seven of us. I was thrilled to be with Sensei in such a small group. Usually when I see him there are 35-40 in attendance.
We meditated and it was bliss.
Then the topic of the day was how the sangha was to move forward. It was a heated discussion. One person declared we should meet only in person. Some were ok with hybrid - both in person and online. The Sensei explained we did not have hybrid capabilities yet and if they were to meet in person, we would want limited capacity - a third of what we had previously. And really based on the attendance at this in person meeting, it appeared most people seemed happier to meet online.
This went on for a little while and since they wanted everyone's input, he looked at me. I felt like I was a part-time participant, so I wasn't sure how much my input was needed. I said, "I'm just happy to be here."
When I think about this, it is perhaps a dilemma we all face. As the old saying goes, "We are spiritual beings having a human experience - not human beings having a spiritual experience."
There is my spiritual being, "I am just happy to be here," all the while observing my humanness squabbling on about this or that.
Not that some things aren't important to discuss, figure out, plan for, be voiced and heard, and I can do that wisely rom my spiritual "I'm just happy to be here" place.